self-gratification

"All of your life you have been taught that it is better to give than to receive. Yet you cannot give what you do not have.
This is why self-gratification is so important – and why it is so unfortunate that it has come to sound so ugly. Obviously, self-gratification at the expense of others is not what we’re talking about here. This is not about ignoring the needs of others. Yet life should also not have to be about ignoring your own needs. Give yourself abundant pleasure, and you will have abundant pleasure to give others."
-quoted from the 2nd book.