explorer of the unknown

-We all have our own comfort zones..
just let me stay in mine.. damn it! -
:p

I may have a large zone. Dunno whether I will be comfortable when moving out of mine though... See what works for me ba :o (just saying it as a matter of fact.. not to complain about anything...)


p.s.: It is possible to enlarge your comfort zone.


p.s.p.s.: It is okay to stay in your comfort zone.


p.s.p.s.p.s.:Good day :o

one stoic please

stoic quotations

• "Man is disturbed not by things, but by the views he takes of them."
  

• "Permit nothing to cleave to you that is not your own; nothing to grow to you that may give you agony when it is torn away."

• "Freedom is secured not by the fulfilling of one's desires, but by the removal of desire."

• "Every person must deal with each thing according to the opinion that he holds about it."

• "He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has."

choice theory

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The housekeeper who cleans my room at the Singapore General Hospital (SGH) is a 46-year-old Kadazan woman from Sabah. She works everyday, and is unfailingly courteous, cheerful and meticulous in her work. I struck up a conversation with her. Her name is Moiri, and life has dealt her a bad hand of cards.

Her husband died in a traffic accident more than 10 years ago when he was in his 30s. She has never been to school but has managed to single-handedly bring up her two children.

Initially, she farmed her land. But whatever padi, vegetables and chicken the farm yielded was barely enough to feed her family and she never grew enough to sell. Working as a cleaner in Sabah earned her RM300 a month.

She came to Singapore five years ago and works now for a cleaning company, ISS Facility Services Private Limited.

She works everyday, including weekends and public holidays, so that she can earn overtime pay. She alternates between working from 7.30am to 11.30pm one day and from 7.30am to 3.30pm the next. She then supplements these normal working hours with overtime. As a result, she earns about $1,370 a month. She works on average about 67.4 hours a week.

She pays $100 a month for a room in an HDB flat at Spottiswood Park which she shares with four other women. She walks to and from SGH to her flat, thus saving on bus and train fares. After deducting the cost of her food, she has $900 to send back to Sabah each month.

She had breast cancer last year and had mastectomy and radiation therapy in SGH. I came to know about her illness because a close friend of mine was also admitted for mastectomy. When Moiri saw her doing her arm exercises, she encouraged my friend, saying she too had been through it and is now well.

ISS Facility Services' company health policy does not cover medical illnesses that are not work-related. In Moiri's case, her total medical expenses came up to about $4,600. The company paid her hospital bills because she had been a consistently good performer - did her job well, always turned up for work and had received numerous compliments from patients and customers. In addition, ISS also granted her two months' paid leave to recuperate.

SGH and ISS staff members voluntarily contributed about $2,000 to Moiri, which they gave to her as an angbao, which she usd for her follow-up treatments. The gift was a clear reflection of the fact that many who knew her, liked and trusted her. Moiri is very grateful to ISS as well as to the many friends she has made in Singapore.

Obviously, many people other than I have taken a liking to this cheerful Kadazan woman who accepts the bad hand of cards that fate has handed her, but chooses to play life's game as best as she can, with good spirit and with no self-pity or bitterness.

Moiri's 24-year-old daughter will be graduating from university this year and will proceed to a teacher's training college. Moiri intends to eventually put her 14-year-old son through university as well.

My friend and I have struck up a friendship with Moiri. She tells us she is happy to be among patients who smile at her an invited both of us to her 'humble' home in Sabah. She said she has peace of mind, happiness in her heart, and many friends in Singapore. What more could she ask for?

I was very touched by her remarks and the matter-of-fact manner in which she related her life story.

How many of us, who may have more than Moiri has, are as satisfied or contented as she? How many of us clamour for more, at the expense of happiness and friendship? How many true friends does each of us really have - friends who are not afflicted with the geen-eyed monster? How many of us can do as much as Moiri has with so little, and yet not complain?

Moiri has never been to school, but she is wise. She approaches life with the Stoic philosophy, though she does not know about it. However adverse circumstances are, our happiness is within our control. I may be crippled, but I can choose to hobble around cheerfully or allow myself to sink into deep depression.

I myself have been crippled by fractures five times between 2001 and 2005. Like Moiri, I had not heard of or read Stoic philosophy then. But I hobbled around on crutches at a pace that was faster than that of a normal young adult walking. One friend complimented me: "You are getting very agile on crutches." I replied: "I have had a lot of opportunity to practise."

Recently, I did read about Stoic philosophy. Epictetus, a Greek Stoic philosopher who lived in the first century, put it very eloquently thus: "I must die. But must I die groaning? I must be imprisoned. But must I whine as well? I must suffer exile. Can anyone hinder me from going with a smile, and a good courage, and at peace?"

In short, it is not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters. People are not disturbed by particular events as such, but by the view they take of them. Moiri does not have formal education, but she knows how to live her life. She is a much happier than many who are richer and more educated than she.

Adapted from The Straits Times; by Lee Wei Ling, Director of the National Neuroscience Institute.
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I came across this article while attending my course on Choice Theory / Reality Therapy. The core foundation of this practice focuses on relationships. Indeed, many people are choosing to depress due to issues pertaining to relationships. With good relationships, we can choose to make life so much better. The two questions I always leave clients with, when they have performed a specific action in reaction to a situation - Did my action / words meet my objectives? Did my action / words improve the relationship? If no, then why bother?

7 Connecting Habits to ensure good relationship with everyone - Listen, Support, Encourage, Respect, Trust, Accept, Negotiate
7 Deadly Habits that will certainly sour a relationship - Blame, Bribe, Complain, Criticise, Nag, Punish, Threaten

I might not have control over the actions of others, but I choose how I will like to react to them, and the last thing I want is to sour a relationship. Let's start choosing today. =)

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everything above this line was taken from andy's email :o

no to 平淡!

Think a stagnant life is kinda boring... ... gr appreciates changes along the way to allow life to be funner and more enjoyable :o



A few days back, I saw this bunch of...... senior ladies dancing to a song by S.H.E.... Felt good just watching them dance... Dunno why I felt happy just watching them dance.. Is it because of their courage? Or is it because they are having fun? ... I felt the same thing when I saw this musical instruments performance at this open space near canteen ... by a group of malay primary school kids from (Yishun Primary School?) . I was at the canteen buying a cup of teh-o, deciding whether to go see the performance and risk being late for my prof com lesson. I went in the end la... and i didn't regret my decision :p The moment they started playing their instruments, everyone in the audience was silent. At the start, a few group of instruments was being played individually. Then, after a while, all of them started to play together and were even dancing along to the music.... so cute laaa :o ... :p I just felt super good and was grinning from ear to ear... :p I was sitting on the railing but I couldn't help myself from balancing my cup of unfinished drink at the corner of the railing, so that I can give them a round of applause ... :p
Kudos to those who dare :o

(not to my ah ma who dare to shout for my brother though... She did it a few times outside our unit and he is in camp.... :s)

fairytale

Estelle and Jolyn were showing me photos of how a guy proposed to his girlfriend. There were big photos with captions, friends and (family?), and a diamond ring :s
There was this photo which sort of suggested that if the girl friend said yes, they can just spend the rest of their lives traveling... This just seems very romantic to me... :8

How will your own fairytale be like?

loss

This morning, I just realized that I lost my thumbdrive... :s Wish that the person who took it, will return it to me tommorow.. *pray*

boran

I think I took this photo a few months back. The gardener was watering the plants in the rain :s






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This photo is not really far away from reality... His smile is usually like this..... :6


haha!!


waa... the thinner candice.... haha..

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Sometimes, being short-sighted does have its advantages.. You will not be picky with the smaller details because you can't see them... :8

走火入魔

I tend to want to strangle those people who don't want to feel good... :/

I think I've been too extreme in practising good.... :s

model answer....?

jolyn and candice trying to act les....


I though the photo above looked rather cute :o



Just because most people react in a certain way to a similar situation, it doesn't mean that what they are doing is right, or that you have to follow them. Things doesn't have to go a certain way, a standard way... E.g. getting hurt doesn't mean that you have to be sad for a few days at least...

Just do whatever that works for you, in getting what you want for yourself..

doraemon

The ending of Doraemon

edited: My friend says that there is another ending to the this story. It says that Doraemon has never existed and it was just a figment of Da Xiong's imagination... :/

star cycle

cy·cle

–noun

1. any complete round or series of occurrences that repeats or is repeated.

2. a round of years or a recurring period of time, esp. one in which certain events or phenomena repeat themselves in the same order and at the same intervals.

3. any long period of years; age.

4. a bicycle, motorcycle, tricycle, etc.

5. a group of poems, dramas, prose narratives, songs etc., about a central theme, figure, or the like: the Arthurian cycle.

6. Physics.

a. a sequence of changing states that, upon completion, produces a final state identical to the original one.

b. one of a succession of periodically recurring events.

c. a complete alteration in which a phenomenon attains a maximum and minimum value, returning to a final value equal to the original one.

7. Mathematics. a permutation of a set of elements that leaves the original cyclic order of the elements unchanged.

8. Computers.

a. the smallest interval of time required to complete an operation in a computer.

b. a series of computer operations repeated as a unit.

–verb (used without object)

9. to ride or travel by bicycle, motorcycle, tricycle, etc.

10. to move or revolve in cycles; pass through cycles.

—Idiom

11. hit for the cycle, Baseball. (of one player) to hit a single, double, triple, and home run in one game.

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Sometimes... it does get a bit tiring when you cycle back to the same place where you were.. Need to get a new perspective or a new destination :o ... or I just need to forget the places that I've been to...
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star light, star bright,
first star i see tonight,
i wish i may,
i wish i might,
have the wish i wish tonight...


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awaiting the lift up...

battery

Aquarius: You feel like a battery today, charging people up and letting them go on their way. Most people are are grateful for the energy you provide but the lazy ones may grumble.

:p

aura

Click on this if you feel like it :o
feel-better-button

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Since last year, I have been down to this shop, Kang Li Feng Shui & Crystal Centre (#01-06/07/08/24/25) which is at Fu Lu Shou Complex, at Bugis to have photos of my aura taken.
Apart from the printed analysis of the different colours of your aura, you can also approach the shop assistants for the explanation of the colours in your photo.

200903

200904

20090531

20090615

20100316

Yesterday, the lady at the shop told me that, based on the three white spots in the top right of the pinkish halo (love) around me, I have three fantasies relating to love. I wonder what they are....
haha..

walk the talk

Sometimes, I take pride in noticing the things that other people don't.

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I had a dream last night... I dreamt that I was being chased to return something. I remembered that I was quite pressured... Think it should be related to my FYP... :/ The deadline is next monday.

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I've been talking too much... The recent comments from d just made me feel kinda sick of my own blog. I realized that I've only been preaching and not giving any real life examples...

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i change, you change

"The person you can really change is yourself. But the beauty is - if you change, they will too."

-andy

sad block

I get energy from comfortable relationships.
But recently, other priorities are obstructing the flow.....

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Sometimes when people feel sad, they may not need any advice or solutions...
They just need a ear, a shoulder and a hug... These may just be all they want.

goal!

People in a group, with common objectives, will go places :o

rank: one>two

During a few times, when others don't feel good... when there is no solution in sight, and after I offer a few different advices, and they don't feel better after... I'll tend to get a bit depressed... and I may even get a bit frustrated :s ..... I don't like myself like this :/




I will always remember that there will always be ways to allow others to feel better... It's just that I may not help in providing the ways... Or that I might be too close-minded to see other ways...




Reminder: Be more open-minded :o

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Don't be surprised... but the first priority will always be more important than the second one.

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Note: Always know what you want (not necessarily what others want), so you will know what you want to achieve. And if it is that important to you, keep reminding yourself so that you will have the motivation to fight for it.

waiting

Do you know the feeling of waiting for someone who is late?If you don't like it, then don't be the late one...

I want to be the "on-time one" :/

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13 more days........ :s

dead drunk

Getting high is not worth the hangover and vomitting...... :s

sweat off the pimples :o

Somehow or rather, I think sweating helps to reduce the seriousness of pimples, especially those acne-like pimples where there's no whiteheads or blackheads present. As I used to run quite a bit, and sweat a lot, I don't really experienced those kind. But ever since I've reduced in my frequency of running to around once a week or once every two weeks, there's an over population of acne-like pimples :s

I'll run at least twice a week :o



Here's something gross and super funny to watch... :p

something bigger

"I'll pay for your

• electricity bills
• utilities bills
• rent for a year
• kid's education for a year
• insurance for the car
• etc...
  

"

I think it all came up to $10 000 plus... Ellen was helping this family who didn't had any electricity for 2 months... Again, the mom was so super happy and grateful... And I teared again...

It's not all about the money...

I teared again when I saw the MTV "We are the world" which was sung by a lot of stars.

:/

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I wanna be a "toucher" :o

strange archilles' heel

Outbreakzzzzzzzzz.....


Some shadows went to have the steamboat buffet at holland village crystal jade tonight.


There were so much meat...... :s If I had one more xiao long bao, I would have vomitted :s


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What is your archilles' heel for name-calling? Here is a list of words that others may call you..

• weird
• loner
• crazy
• slut
• bimbo
• selfish
• drug addict
• nerd
• insensitive
• etc...

Which one would you react the most to?

If it is true, you don't have to be defensive towards the comment, you can just accept it because it is the truth. If it is not true, it is because people perceive things differently from how you see yourself... or maybe they saw something that you didn't? .. :s

I think I'm talking rubbish.... :/

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ugly betty wisdom

"Taste is...... is having the courage of your own convictions."
-Willemina

"terrified"

You by the light
Is the greatest find
In a world full of wrong
You're the thing that's right

Finally made it through the lonely
To the other side

Chorus:
You said it again
My heart's in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watchin' the shadows burnin' in the dark

And I-I-I'm in love (I'm in love)
And I-I-I'm terrified
For the first time
And the last time
In my only life, life

-Kara DioGuardi

sento san

On Sunday, I went to tony roma's with a meal voucher I got from the purchase of my current printer last year.



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I went to sentosa with a bunch of uni friends yesterday and got a tan and a pair of almost-blistered feet :s We were playing volleyball on the super hot sand and I didn't wear my slippers.


I still find it weird that jolyn and the japanese girls can just stand on the beach and sing jap songs for 10 plus mins :/ ... :p haha...





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Most of the time, I'm for "going with your feeling". It makes things a lot easier and you will not regret not doing anything. It's like... being straight forward with yourself and following through with your feelings.

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I think I know why I'm always so serious. For me, I take it that, whatever I say or think or do, will declare the kind of person I want to be. It is not so simple as to.. just to say that I'm a serious person.